The Braillettes were based in Philidelpha PA.  Not only were they all blind as coots, but they refused to use the word "the" in any of their songs.  Originally there were four girls in the act, but Minty kept wandering away.  The group broke up amid scandal a year after this album, when it was revealed that Zelda (in the middle) was actually not blind but deaf.
In the ’50’s there was a formal language of dance. Here, you see him trying to impress her with what he will be offering her in the back of his Studebaker in just a little while.  She is doing steps that indicate she is not convinced, and anyway would be turning lezo if that lot ever came her way. Note the girl on the left, who is checking out his latest cheekless pants, a little-known and short-lived craze back then, luckily stamped out by Ronnie Reagan in his original “just say no” campaign
	The Cha Cha Cha is almost forgotten now but was huge in the '50s.  As you can see from the album cover, it involved "making like a statue" for the entire duration of the album.  The winner was the one able to hold the goofiest expression the longest without farting. Pepe Luis was one of the main Cha-Cha Kings of the time and although he was small he was perfectly formed and a great success with the ladies. The other members of his Orchestra (Jose, Philipo, WooTang and Claud) played for many years at the Prawn-fork Club, the fourth-hippest gig in Spodmondo IL.   Also note the fashions of the time.  The short legs on the pants were desgined to make you look taller, which was clearly too little too late in Pepe's case. Eventually the Orchestra disbanded (or maybe the Band disorchestrated - you be the judge !).  Pepe went on to become a guest host at Strip Twister evenings where in 1967 he met with a fatal accident while trying to balance a lemon between his knees.
Millie Jackson's unique vocal style made her an overnight record sensation.  Her first album Disco Shriek was the surprise hit of 1978.  Then it emerged she could only sing while doing number 2's, pressing down hard.  She eventually did a single US tour, culminating in this live album, recorded at the  bathroom in Club 54 in New York in front of an audience of 6000
	Country singer Freddie Gage sang it like it was.  He was a minor hit in Nashville with songs like "Billy-Bob was like a brother to me until I pureed his splean" and the haunting "I'm all alone since I ate you". Freddie is now serving 20 to life for stalking and attempted murder.
Cashing in shamelessly on the disabled musician craze of the 50s to 70s was Dwayne and his guide dog Nigel.  Nigel sang backups and played  “dog breath” harp. In fact, when this was taken, Wayne thought he was in a recording studio with the fans turned up high.
	Here are 6 of Roger's facets.  He has one more but this was not suitable for a record cover.  Roger described his style as jive-talk-lounge; which pretty much sums it up.
Ska has a tough message with a thread of protest running through it.  Bands like The Specials telling us to wear a condom, or Selector suggesting we "Boil our heads for peace" (come to think of it, I may have made that one up).  In Special Brew we certainly take our sociopolitical role seriously - it's not just about entertainment or dressing up in alluring red backless cocktail dresses you know. But we're nothing compared to "The Playmates".  Tough, gritty, socially relevant, hard-hitting.  In the spirit of rebellion that is Ska, Jimmy, Mikey and Feepo are flaunting all known highway laws and riding their vespa all together.  What's more, they appear to be enjoying themselves, except for Mikey.  Long live Ska, long live The Playmates.
	Who would have thought that Bob the chimp could be a rock star?  Obviously RCA Victor did, and they thought people would fork out 49c for the record.  Actually, they were wrong.  Bob couldn’t even hold a tune.  Bob was sold to a zoo in ’66 and never worked again.  Fame is fickle
I bought this in a hurry and should have read the label more carefully.
	.. you’ve wanted to be in Movies but have no talent.  Never fear, you can train your bird to be as big as these stars (WC Fields, the Duke, Herman Munster, Adolf Hitler to name just a few), then live off the feathered meal-ticket’s earnings.  The beauty of this arrangement is that Polly makes a nice pie when he has become a has-been.
If I were a woman, this album would be hard to resist.  Even as a straight man I can still appreciate the lyrics, the angst expressed in “screwed and tattooed”, or the touching “I seen her first”.  Thankyou Dooryard Records.  Thankyou Chicken.
	I bought this because it reminded me of some of my less successful dates.  Unfortunately the music sucks big time, which is also very similar to my less successfull dates.
“Gee – I don’t know?” “I don’t think I could get intimate with a man with 2 right hands”.
	What the hell sort of music is on this one?  Not too many clues on the cover, though the suggestive looking spaceship in the background could be a clue.  In fact, it turns out to be Bing Crosby covers reworked for Theramin and Carrot-flute, with Les humming along. Also, looks like Les is dosing the girls with some trusty rohypnol.  Bottoms up!
Sponsored by OLD-HAGS (Order of Loggers & Diggers - Heterosexual Guys Against Gay Stereotypes division), this record was released to combat the amazing success of Monty Pothon’s Lumberjack Song, which somewhat demeaned the entire profession, but sold a lot better than this album.
	Formed in 1965 as a result of a practical joke played on them by their mutual friends at Hair College, Spingville NY, guitarists Raylene and Bobby-Jo-Billy-Jimmy, and drummer “Andre” made this, their first record.  Their lyrics spoke of their philosophy of the world, and in particular the importance of long straight hair. Critics panned the album not only on the basis of the lyrics, but because the guitars and drums could barely be heard.  The band countered by pointing out that their philosophy of the world did not include the use of amplifiers for their guitars, and what was more, they flatly refused to use a kick drum on religious grounds. The Shaggs went on to make 17 more albums of the same songs, which is odd.
Art imitating life: These musos did indeed become destitute not long after issuing this album.  The one on the right was forced to pawn his moustache
	Lenny woke up one morning and decided to become the world's greatest skiing Hammond organist.  After years of hard practice he achieved his dream.  Although he was not very successful on the international stage, he could often be seen crusing round various waterways, playing medleys from "The King and I" and selling ice creams to passing fishermen. I am sure he would be doing it today, but he was struck by an oil tanker in the Baltic and went down with all hands.  To his credit, as he disappeared below the waves he could be heard playing "My Lord Nearer to Thee" in Gmin.
In 1955, General Richard Tuebickle, known as the “Whistling General”, or “Old Iron Dick”, issued these records as a fantastically cheap way of maintaining an American military presence in Korea. It would have worked, except that North Korea came out with its own superior sound effects record.  This lead to global sound effect escalation, with the threat of playing track 13 (complete nuclear annihilation).  In 1970 Nixon signed the Swaziland Accord with China & Russia to reduce record stockpiles by half. This record is now being played in Iraq.
	Here’s an idea!  Get together a complete symphony orchestra and record an album with a flock of canaries!
A midget and a harp –give me strength
	An interesting marketing idea.  This record was made specifically for use with the Berkline Reclining chair.  If played while reclining in any other chair, the record would emit piercing shrieking noises which made you want to stop reclining and murder the next door neighbour with an axe.
	Another clever marketing idea.  This album was made by Gold Bond Ceilings and if played in a room with any other type of ceiling would play extremely loudly, resulting in the next door  neighbour getting up from their reclining chair and murdering you with an axe.
	Note this spooky fact.  In each of these “marketing” records the model is holding a record with the exact same picture of it – ie. A model holding a record of a model holding a record of a model holding a record of a  …… So how did they take this photo?  Is this proof that there are Venusians?